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Rare is the baby that sleeps through the night at three months. While eventually all babies do sleep, many parents find themselves at the end of their sleep-deprived ropes before this happens. These are usually the most attentive parents, which makes the situation seem even crueler.
There are two reasons babies don’t sleep through the night. The first is that the child is hungry. This is especially true for breastfed babies who must be fed more often than formula fed babies. The second, and much more frequent reason, is that the child understands that crying equals holding and/or feeding whether they are hungry or not. Many parents and doctors do not believe a small child can be this manipulative. Most of these nonbelievers do not have many children or have been blessed by easy children. The rest of us know better.
When a child should sleep through the night is up to the parent’s discretion. Talk to your doctor. Usually a child is able to sleep through the night by four to six months. By this time, the baby should be able sleep through the night with a good bedtime feeding. If breastfeeding, I would supplement this last feeding with a ‘heavy’ baby food like strained peas.
Now comes the hard part. Put the child in bed and walk away. The child will cry during the night. Feel free to check on the child. If the child is fine, don’t pick the child up. The screaming will break your heart and make you crazy. The first night is the worst. The child will cry for a while. The first night I did this with my son at nine months, he cried for 40 minutes. The second night it was 25. The third night is was 5 minutes. The fourth night he didn’t even cry. He’s slept through the night ever since. I felt cruel those four days but afterward I could not believe that I had tortured myself nursing five and six times a night while suffering extreme sleep deprivation.
If this doesn’t work after a week, your child may not be ready. Feedings may have to be whittled down to one a night slowly and then try giving up that middle of the night feeding.
It is definitely a difficult process but a well-rested and much happier mom quickly forgets the small period of difficulty!
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